#ONCEGAY

As a Ministry there are times when we are accused of being homophobic.  This accusation is most often received via social media which provides the safety of anonymity and a lack of personal interaction. Those who meet anyone connected with our ministry would be clear that there is nothing about us at all that could be deemed to be homophobic.  So why do we receive this feedback?  One of the reasons is because we are open about our changed identity, we no longer identify as gay; and because of that we use hashtags such as once gay, ex gay, ex LGBT or former gay.

A recent response to our asking what had upset someone about one of our posts resulted in a response in which they told us that the hashtag ‘once gay’ makes it ‘seem like you can change.’  So is this the root of these accusations, suggesting that someone could change from gay to straight is a claim too far?
 
What then do we make of the term “abrosexual” which is to be found on the list of Stonewall’s LGBTQ+ terms.  They give the following explanation:

ABRO - A word used to describe people who have a fluid sexual and/or romantic orientation which changes over time, or the course of their life. They may use different terms to describe themselves over time.

This leads me to understand that having fluid sexuality means you may change over time, isn’t that exactly what we are saying by utilising #once gay. This simply says we used to identify as gay but we no longer feel that way. In a world of equal opportunity and where choice matters, wouldn’t it be great if we could all respect others freedom to choose without throwing harmful accusations at each other?

I am privileged to be part of a community of many Christians who have chosen to follow Jesus, and as part of that choice, chosen to base their identity in him and no longer in a sexual identity which was championed by the world. We do not hate, we do not fear, we are not homophobic, we simply choose not to label ourselves based on sexuality.  Our choice is to let the world know that we are Christian, pursuers of Jesus and living the best lives we can for Him.
 
In explaining that choice to others we may use the #oncegay hashtag; please do not misunderstand us, our love is real, our desire simply to share what Jesus has done in our lives.